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Tuesday, January 29, 2013

Just a quick cry

A roller coaster. That is what I feel like I am on.  Despite the converstion I had today I still feel good. I still feel positive.  I'm still feeling strong.  It's just taking a lot of concentration and focus to stay on my "I am in charge of my attitude" track.

I spoke with Dr. Sardi today.  He's one of the best surgical oncologist when in comes to PMP.  I sent him my records about 2 weeks ago and I still hadn't heard if they had received my records so I called earlier today.  I was quite shocked when Dr. Sardi called me back personally.  I think he was trying to reach my Dr. here in Tampa, but he stayed on the phone with me.  He said based on my specific pathology and how early this was found, I have a 90% chance of cure with the HIPEC.  Yes, with the HIPEC.  He feels I definitely need the surgery.  Without it, he says the mucin will likely grow into many tumors.  He said that the sooner I did the surgery the better the outcome because there would be minimal tumor spread, which would mean less organs would need to be removed (spleen, gallbladder, uterus, ovaries, omentum, amoung others that are sometimes removed during HIPEC)  He felt that as of today (and without seeing the inside of my abdomen) the only 100% must go organs would be my right ovary, right fallopian tube and omentum. Once we got off the phone I had a good, quick cry in the parking lot of rollin oats. (I was on my way there to get my daily wheatgrass shot)  I composed myself pretty quickly considering the expert opinion I just received. I figure 90% chance of a cure is actually amazing.  Of course the thought of enduring HIPEC makes my skin crawl and my heart break a bit, but hallelujah.... 90% is much better than I had read.  I think he gave this statistic because I was caught so early and I have the low grade PMP (some people get a high grade aggressive version which is horrible) and because I'm young and strong.  It's just so scary because there has to be some cons to having HIPEC..... What will it do to my body? I've heard the recovery can be anywhere from 2-6 months.  

I still need to hear back from Dr. Sugarbaker.  Once I hear what he has to say, Sean and I will fly up to Washington, DC/Baltimore to meet with both of the Dr.'s to see who we feel the most comfortable with.  No offical decision has been made on having HIPEC but my first response is I'm not going to gamble with watching and waiting if I have a 90% chance of a cure with the surgery and a pretty certain chance of the disease progressing if I do nothing (which in turn would make the surgery more difficult and the cure % would go down.)  I definitely wish there was another way to get rid of this stupid disease.  I feel so healthy today.  It's bizarre and twisted to feel healthy but also to have something inside you that can kill you.  

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