Another big day tomorrow

Sean and I will be meeting with Dr Loggie tomorrow after an MRI. He will discuss my blood test results, MRI results and the results of the special testing he had done on my pathology slides.

Any prayers, positive thoughts, Etc. you can said my way is very much appreciated.

Goals and Gratitude

I watched two documentaries this weekend.   Forks over knifes and Happy.  I definitely recommend both.  Watching Happy was so powerful.  It is amazing how people with what we would consider so little are SO happy and I look around at so many people who have SO much and are not nearly as happy as the people with less.  I took a lot away from the film but what I want to concentrate on this week is the act of unsolicited kindness and finding things I am passionate about, espciallay things that challange me.

Kindness:  Human beings thrive on doing things for others. We all know how good it feels to do something for someone, especially when they are not expecting it.  It can be as simple as holding a door for a stranger or buying coffee for the person behind you at Starbucks ( or your local organic coffee shop :) The options are endless and I plan on doing more and more kind things for friends and strangers.

Passion:  Please don't get me wrong, I have plenty in my life that I am passionate about, especially when it comes to my family but I know I am missing something that challanges me.  I grew up playing competitive soccer.  It was my life.  I loved practicing. I love getting better and I loved challenging myself.  I loved the feeling of walking off of the field knowing I played my heart out.  As I have reflected on my life these past few months I am realizing that maybe I lost a part of myself when I stopped playing.  When something is such a big part of your life and then suddenly it is not, you do loose a part of yourself.  And I never really replaced it.  Since I stopped playing I have remained active but nothing has come close to the committment I had when soccer was in my life. I'm not sure I'm going to reactivate my soccer career but I need to find something.  I have been taking yoga classes and I really like it.  I am thinking about coaching soccer again. I really loved that too  I just know that I need something in my life that challanges me and that I am passionate about.

And lastly, giving thanks to what we have is something that should be a part of all of our lives.  Seriously, I know that I am extremely blessed and even in my doom and gloom moments, just concentrating on all that is good can really help.  I have started a gratitude journal and plan on wrting in it often, even if it is a little list of what was good that day.

Just Be

I have learned that I have been living a life centered around doing.  I have done a great job at doing, doing, doing.  Whether it was work or sports or social or anything really.... most of my life I have been a people pleaser and a "just do it" kind of gal.  My new outlook on life, on my life, is to just be.  I want to feel and trust what I want in every aspect of my life.  There is no right thing to do, there's only what feels right.  This is a very hard habit to break. VERY HARD. I find myself having to talk myself into it being ok to do or not do something.  It sounds so silly but I've spent my life doing a lot of things that I felt I had to do, or that I should do.   I know this will aide in my quest for optimal health. Our mind has so much control over what goes on inside of our body and I struggle with this area a lot.

I've been dealing with a lot of anxiety over my illness.  Though I believe I am well and healthier that I've ever been, I know there's that chance of the ugly beast coming back.  I will overcome these fears and get to a point where I have a special place in my mind for these fears and I will tuck them away and live my life with no fear.

Our bodies have an incredible way to heal from the inside out.

P.S. Isn't my blog Pretty :)

Makeover time

This blog needs a makeover. I have wanted it to be "prettier" for a while but I am super clueless when it comes to most things computer.  I am hoping to unveil the new blog soon.  Smittenblogdesigns is designing it and I am super excited.

Invision me well

Hello everyone.  I had a great week and I'm very excited to spend the weekend with my family.  I had another session this week to work on my subconscience thoughts.  I feel like I am getting so much out of the time I spend there.  Our whole subconscience being is created throughout our life, including infancy and possible in the womb.  I know some people may be skeptical but every experience in our life shapes us.
Anyway, one thing that Traci and I discussed (that is the woman's name who is working with me) is the power of intention.  I was telling her how incredibly blessed I have been having so many people praying for me.  One suggestion she made is that we all should invision me well and totally healthy- from the tips of my toes all the way up to the top of my head :) I hope you don't mind me telling you what to think :) but if you are thinking about me or praying for me, please think of me in total health not battling cancer.  Please thank God or whoever you pray to for the healing that has occured in my body.  This is a practice that we all can do within ourselves.  If there is something that you are concerned about, instead of spending powerful energy thinking about the fear, concentrate deeply on your desire.  For example, if you are worried about loosing your job, the worst thing you can do is ruminate on how your life is going to be if you are unemployed and how you are doomed and how you'll never survive.  At this point you haven't even lost your job yet.  Instead, meditate on the truth that no matter what you will be ok. That you are capable of anything. That you can survive and that all is perfect today.
Thank you again for all of the support. I am forever grateful.

Omaha here we come

I spoke with Holly at Dr. Loggie's office and they do want to see me.  Remember these specialist have to " accept" you as a patient. Weird but whatever. Sean and I feel like meeting with one more well respected pmp specialist will hopefully give us the confidence it takes to wait and watch.
I've had a little bit of butterflies since my phone call but that aside I've been feeling so great; physically and emotionally. I feel like I am cured now.  I feel like I am total health and cancer can not thrive in me.
The trip is about one month from now.

What I've been doing.....

A while back I posted about the changes I have made in my lifestyle along with the changes we have made as a family.  I am proud to say that we are going strong with our new lifestyle and we are all feeling great. Don't get me wrong, occasionally it is difficult to maintain, like when traveling or on the road, but overall it has been a smooth transition and one that is WAY worth it.
Lets recap:
Food- It's all about fresh, organic goodness people!  Today I am at about a 90% vegetarian diet (all organic) with only 10% animal protein (all grass-fed and finished, organic, wild, etc) I try to wheatgrass everyday.  I try to juice everyday.  My favorite is carrot, cucumber, celery, lemon.  YUM!  No sugar. Not a bit unless it's from a fruit.  That means no cookies, cake, chocolate, etc ( I miss that sometimes )  And no alcohol.  I don't really miss it too much.  Maybe I miss an occassional glass of red wine, but I am certain staying away from all sugar is more important than a glass of wine.

My day starts with an amazing, homemade smoothie.  Ingredients include one organic cucumber, organic kale and spinach, ice, blue bonnet protein powder, raw cacao nibs, greens powder, an avocado, some blueberries and maybe a splash of almond milk or coconut milk if it needs to be thinned.  I do alter the ingredients occasionally but that one is my favorite.  Sean also drinks this in the morning and I think he may be as addicted to it as I am. After drinking it I feel great.
Dinner is typically something vegetarian.  I love roasting sweet potatoes.  I love raw-getti which is zuccinni pasta.  We eat "raw" stir frys, lots of different, yummy recipes. I also bough a dehydrator and I am addicted to veggie burgers.  They are 100% made from organic veggies, nuts and flax and are considered raw.  So good!!!

I snack all the time on nuts, hummus and carrots, and many other veggies. My favorite places to eat while I'm working are Abbey's on North Dale Mabry, Oxford Exchange, Boca and my absolute favorite is Rawk Star Cafe in Palm Harbor. Don't get me started on how awesome that place is!  Everything there is raw, organic and delicious.

Supplements
I take a lot of supplements.  A lot of what I have done with my diet (and my family's diet) along with the supplements I take has been from working with Alex Poptodorova.  He is so smart.  I've been on his protocol for about 6 months and I am seriously healthy.  In fact, I was just told by a doctor that I had one of the healthiest "guts" he's seen.  (more about that later in the post) Anyway, I take a lot of supplements.  I concentrate on immune boosting, probiotics and others.

Exercise and products.
I need to exercise more.  After I hurt my knee skiing in March I took a little time off but I'm back at it.  I  do Yoga on Monday nights, weights 2 times a week and some sort of fun cardio once or twice a week. I still use as natural or organic products as possible.  All cleaning products are Meyers.  Organic laundry detergent, pest control company, shampoo, conditioner, makeup, lotion, tooth paste, tampons, cookware, dry cleaner, diapers (for Liam :).  Everything is as natural as possible. I actually just went off the deep end this week and ordered an organic mattress for Ava and Liam.  Apparently a typical matress is laced with so many chemicals that we spend half of our life breathing that in.  Holy cow!!!  Sean and I are shopping for our new, organic mattress now.  I may have also purchased new organic cotton sheets for the kids too.  And I'm considering new car seats for them too since the ones they sit in currently have chemicals in them too and when you factor in the Florida heat....... OMG it makes me cringe just thinking about it.

Before I write about the next part a quick thought. I believe in Western medicine.  It is so important.  BUT, I also believe strongly in Eastern medicine and since there isn't much Western medicine can do for me right now I am really getting into Eastern healing.   I have spoken with a medical intuitive.  That was really interesting.  I have seen a Dr. who does muscle testing to check what systems in your body are weak. He is who told me my "gut" is really strong.  Did you know a lot of your immune system is in your digestive tract? I have found that my hormone levels are a bit off (like seretonin, adrenal, cortisol) so I am taking supplements for that.  I have been sleeping much better since I started taking those new supplements.  I have also seen a therapist that uses muscle testing to tap into your sub conscience.  WOW!  That was really intense.  I am really looking forward to working more with her.  I also go to acupuncture and I have been getting a massage twice a month.

I really am so passionate about living a healthy lifestyle. It isn't just about eating salads and exercising when you can. We live in a toxic world. There are chemicals everywhere.  So much of what people eat is processed and so far from what we were made to eat.  I am certain that our body is not meant to thrive on oreos and doritos.  We need as much of a plant based diet as possible.  (i.e. fruits and vegetables)  It is hard to change habits but once you do you feel better than you've ever felt. I could talk for hours about how important it is to take care of your body.  Why does our culture wait until something is wrong to make a change (yes, I am guilty of that)  I wish SO much I had lived this way prior to my diagnosis.  Why do many people believe there will be a pill to fix a problem should it arise?  I'll be the first to tell you that isn't so.  I had a serious problem arise and there is no pill or reasonable treatment that can make it go away. I am healing through food, exercise and emotional and spiritual healing.

All of the changes I made couldn't have been possible without the support of my husband, Sean. He supports me and believes in this lifestyle too.  A big thank you to Alex and Ashley Poptodorova, Sam, my sister Charna, my sister-in-law Nicole and all of the other people who have encouraged me on this natural, organic path I am now living and LOVING.