one in a million

Uggg. Ups and Downs.  I'm really going to confuse you all (and myself).  Everything is still the same.  I think I'm just dealing with the settling in part.  I can't believe that I have a cancer that effects one in a million people. I actually googled one in a million and "if you are one in a million there are 6000 people just like you" popped up.  But then I thought, well how many of those 6000 had a second STUPID cancer. I feel like I won the powerball of cancer odds.  Does that even make sense? Even being 3 weeks out from surgery I still feel like a really healthy person.  It almost knocks the wind out of me when I think that I-have-cancer.

I had my first meditation class today.  For those of you who know me, you know I'm not one to sit still. I have a hard time being quiet (just ask my husband or my mom).  And to be honest, I have a hard time shutting my thoughts off.  It was really nice to get an introduction to what meditation is and how to do it.  I feel like I learned a lot. I even made it through a 20 minute practice.

I also had my first really green, alkalinizing smoothie this morning.  I was nervous I wouldn't be able to tolerate it but I felt just fine afterwards.  It was really yummy too.  Coconut water, 1 avacado, 1 cucumber (without seeds), 1 banana, 1 handful of spinach, cacao nibs, a little protein powder, probiotics and ice.

Here's to another post that is just all over the place. (sort of like my thoughts, but I'm making progress :)